Monday, August 30, 2010


Good news to report!! Our paperwork made it!! Our adoption will continue!!


I really believe that God heard our prayers and took care of us. On Thursday, there was no hope. When we went to bed, we knew it was over. We prayed, we know our family and friends prayed, and all the friends and families of other parents trying to adopt from Rwanda prayed. Overnight the government made the small change to allow paperwork from any Rwandan embassy. This was our chance. I believe God heard the prayers and made a way for us to continue. Since it was the weekend, we had to wait and be totally dependent on God. We could only pray and wait to see what He would do. And boy did He take care of us!! Our paperwork was were it needed to be when this whole announcement came out but we could not know that until today. I will say, not having any control and having to wait, is not fun at all, but God knew what He was doing and I guess He didn't want us in the way.

Even though it worked out for us, there are still families trying to get there paperwork to the embassy. PLEASE CONTINUE TO PRAY FOR THESE FAMILIES!! The week has started and they have to hit the ground running to get everything done in time. I know how they are feeling. I felt that way all weekend. I am happy for Paul and myself but at the same time I still feel anxious for these other families. They want their child as much as we want ours. I ask again, PLEASE CONTINUE TO PRAY FOR THESE FAMILIES!! God knows who they are and we have seen that He will answer prayers!

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Words Can Not Express Our Full Gratitude

I wanted wanted to send out a word of thanks to everyone out there.

Paul and I cannot thank everyone enough for their love and support during these last few trying days. People have come out of the woodwork to pray and encourage us. During this whole ordeal, we have felt scared, confused, disappointed,and grieved but one thing we have never felt is alone. We are humbled and grateful for our family, friends and those recent connections that we have made in the adoption community.

We want to again say, thank you so much for everything!!! The text messages, facebook messages, blog comments, and phone calls have meant more than you could ever know. Paul and I are truly grateful to have each and everyone of you in our lives.

Tomorrow, Monday, we should be getting a call from AGCI and they should know where our paperwork is and what we need to do next. Please continue to pray that our paperwork makes it to the Rwandan embassy. I will try and keep everyone updated to any and all information I get.

Friday, August 27, 2010

Slightly Good News

Well, there was some slightly good news this morning. Over night the Rwanda government changed there announcement to say that as long is our adoption paperwork is in ANY Rwandan embassy it will be processed. This is hopeful. Our paperwork is in DC and has been there for a week. If our paperwork can make it to the Rwandan embassy in DC by next Tuesday then we are good.

PLEASE KEEP PRAYING!! Please pray that our paperwork makes it to the embassy!

Bad News

Well, apparently earlier today Rwanda made the announcement that they are suspending all international adoptions as of August 31, 2010. Here is why...

Our dossier has no chance of making it to Rwanda by the 31st. NONE

I want to be the person that can say, "God is in control. I'm not going to worry." I want to be the person who can praise and worship after hearing this news. But I'm not. I want to be that person, I really do, but I'm the person screaming, "God this hurts!! God, why?!?!?" I'm beaten down, heartbroken, and crying.

I had never seen a picture of our daughter but I knew she was there. I had never seen her smile but I knew she had one. Nights upon nights I would dream about her. We had talked of the trips we would go on and the things we would see. Right now, in this moment, I feel like all of this has been stripped away. I thought this roller coaster ride was over. I knew that there might be delays but never did I think the program would be stopped. I have been thrown right back into that pit I was in when we were struggling with infertility.

We knew God was leading us to Rwanda, we just knew it. I have to believe that there is still hope. I know this was not a surprise to God. I know that He works all things to the good of those who love Him. I know there is a big picture but this still hurts. It hurts bad!!

No one really has any definite information on what is going on in Rwanda. We should know more on the 31st. PLEASE PRAY!! I don't know that I can right now so you guys will have to pray for me.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

We did it!

We finally did it! We finished ALL of our paperwork. A couple of weeks ago we were telling everyone that we finished our dossier, but we still had the I-600A to do. Now...everything is done. We mean it this time!

AGCI (Julie) called and said everything was good with our dossier, except we didn't get the birth certificate and marriage license certified. We thought they were certified the way they were, but we were wrong. So, we went ahead and finished the I-600A while we were waiting for her to send the certificates back. Then we took off for another whirlwind trip to Nashville. Thank you God that these only had to be state certified and not county also. We went to the state building and took care of our papers, then headed for the nearest FedEx office, and before we left Nashville our papers were on their way.

We tracked our packages and our I-600A arrived at the US CIS office around 10am, local time, and our certificates made it to AGCI around 1pm local time. Julie sent us an e-mail and told us she would send our dossier out today!! YAY!! We are so excited. What a big weight off our shoulders!!

Monday, August 16, 2010

How a week can change things...

This post won't be uplifting or talk about anything wonderful that has happened in the last week. Just FYI.

There seems to be a cloud that has settled over our house. Stress levels have risen and we always seem to be tired. We have done so much over the last few weeks, I feel like we haven't even been home. *sigh*

We got a call and our marriage and birth certificates weren't certified properly so we are going to have to make another trip to Nashville. Our AC has went out in our house and it is 100 degrees outside. I threw a party this past weekend, and fun as it was, it was stressful to get the house ready for people to come over. On top of the cleaning, we took on the project of putting shelves up in my pantry. That took Paul and my dad about 3 to 4 hours to finish and I was cleaning up around them the whole time.

I know this doesn't sound like much and it sounds like I'm just whining but its the little things that can drag you down. It just seems like there is always something. I guess that is normal. There is probably no reason for me to complain. I just feel like there is a cloud over both our heads and we can't see past it.

The sermon at church yesterday was about faith. How even though we can't see the big picture, God knows what is happening and why it is happening. I feel like I can say, "yeah, I know that" but acting on that knowledge is hard sometimes. I need stronger faith. I can say to myself "oh, I won't worry about this" or "I can wait on God's timing for this" and then in 5 minutes I can find myself worrying or finding ways to make things happen faster and not even realizing I'm doing it. I don't know how to make my faith stronger or even if I can do it myself. Maybe God needs to tweak me more. Whatever it is, I can tell you we are in a faith low point right now.

Maybe in a week things will start looking better.

Monday, August 9, 2010

And there was much rejoicing....

OK, so I wrote out this whole nice story about what we did last week. Then I went to publish and it lost the entire post. Pictures and everything gone. *Sigh* Is this God telling me no one really wants to read this? OK, one more time...

Once upon a time there was a Prince and a Princess and they wanted a baby of their own. But they wanted to make sure they got the right baby, the one that was meant for them alone. They searched high and they searched low but she couldn't be found. Then, finally, as if God actually drew them a map they knew she was in Rwanda. So off they went. They made plans and preparations for their journey to get their daughter. From out of nowhere this big, bad, awful wizard wanted to make sure they were right for there daughter. Even though, the prince and the princess knew deep in their hearts there could be no other, they couldn't see a way around the mountain of paperwork the wizard had placed in front of them. So, with resolute hearts, the prince and princess decided they would do anything to bring their daughter home. Together they accepted the quest of the dossier. After months and months of toiling, it was finally coming to an end. The princess and the king (my dad) went to the town of Maryville to have the home study county certified. Two days later the prince and princess were to make the final trek of this quest and go to Nashville. But first, as in all quests, preparations must be made. The set off to Chattanooga to make sure everything was properly notarized and county certified. Just so they could remember their journey they recorded some of the happenings.

Here is a picture of the last letters being notified...

Then the quest took the prince and princess to Dunlap for one last county certification. After a long morning of hither and thither, the royal couple finally set off to the final stop, Nashville. They had finally made it. They were at the end of the quest but then the evil wizard conjured up construction and remodelling of the building they were to enter. The Prince and princess were terribly frustrated after they had walked the entire circumference of the building. Had the evil wizard finally stopped them? No! Nothing would stop them!! They triumphed when they finally found an entrance. Once inside there was another royal couple following the same path and two more entered after. It was a wonderful sight to see other couples following the path to find their special child that was made just for them. The evil wizard could not defeat them. The prince and princess got all of their papers state certified. They documented this event so that everyone could rejoice with them.

Their quest being completed they went home so the could rejoice with the entire family. The princess, being tired from the journey, changed from her royal garb into resting clothes. The princess hopes everyone will pardon this.

The royal couple wanted to be sure everything was perfect and that everything was in order so they sent their dossier to their fairy godmother at AGCI. She is helping the prince and princess in this daunting quest. They wanted the packet to arrive safely and quickly so the went to the local Fed Ex office and magically the fairy godmother received it today.

How do I know all of this? I know this because I am the princess and I anxiously await my daughter. I am willing to travel to the ends of the earth to find her and I am bursting with excitement and anticipation waiting for the day I can bring her home!!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

What a wonderful weekend!

We had such a great weekend. If you didn't know, we went to a benefit dinner held by our adoption agency, All God's Children International. This dinner was a way for AGCI to raise money to help more people in the countries in which they work. They also let us in on ways that we can do more to help the hurting people out there. The more I learn about these things, the more I come to understand that here in America we live in a bubble. We have everything we could ever need and more. All it takes is just a small sacrifice on our part, I mean a really small sacrifice, to make a big difference in someone else's life. None of us could ever imagine what it would be like to not have clean water, not have 3 (or in my case more) meals a day, or to only have a few things to wear. Most of us have full cupboards, overflowing closets, and about 4 faucets that spout clean water whenever we want it. What if that wasn't there? What would you do? There are so many ways out there that we can make a difference! Imagine what would happen if we all did just that little something!! What would happened if you didn't spend that extra money at Wal-Mart on that thing you didn't really need? Instead, you gave that money to a good cause or bought a fair trade item?

OK, off my soapbox now. But, please, think about it!!

On Saturday we went to the AGCI family picnic, and it was lots of fun. It was so great to be able to talk with people who really understand. I could say, "we are so happy our home study is done" or "we are almost done with our dossier" and they knew exactly what I was talking about and totally understand our feelings of relief. Don't get me wrong...I love that our family and friends care and ask questions but no one really understands if they haven't been through it.

The picnic and dinner really motivated us to get home and finish our dossier. Just 3 forms left! Then we start the county and state certifications. Ugh! Hopefully that won't take too long or be too much trouble.

Sometimes the waiting is so hard. I want her here so badly that I sometimes think I might explode from the wanting. We are trying to keep on top of the paperwork, get her room ready, and get the house ready. I'm even cross-stitching a picture for her room. It does help to keep busy, but then sometimes that wanting just creeps up on you and grabs you. *sigh* Some days I don't think I can wait any longer. I guess God is teaching me patience.

I've never asked for this but here goes...Please pray that I'll have patience.